I Can Live With That

If you happened to be at Barnes & Noble at the Galleria a couple of days ago and felt your ears being assaulted by a screaming lunatic, that would be the Little Miss.

I just can't live with that.

I used to think I knew what public humiliation was all about, like, walking confidently in a mall while not knowing that my fly was open. Or wave back enthusiastically to someone only to realize moments later that they were waving to the person behind me. Or perhaps trip over something small that caused me to fall ungracefully in front of many people. I could go on.

However, I submit to you that there is no grander public humiliation than that of your own child profusely misbehaving for all to see and hear. It exposes the secret fear that says I don't think I'm a very good mom. And as the meltdown goes on and on the fear only becomes more and more confirmed.

Once I managed to get back into my car with the Little Miss I came to the conclusion that the best remedy to being nonjudgmental and pulling out the huge log out of my own eye like Jesus talked about, is to walk in another person's shoes for a bit. Before having my little girl I had very strong parenting views that I would most definitely live by no matter what. I probably could have articulated those views with great eloquence. And when I would witness scenarios like the one I experienced I would shake my internal little head in arrogant disapproval. Well, folks, parenting is not as easy as I thought.

The thing is, I still hold to the view that my daughter should not misbehave and that she should obey me and I'm working on that. The difference is, being judgmental assumes that I am better than someone else. The truth is, I am not.

I can live with that.

Beautiful Faye

Yesterday, I got to hang out with my cousins, little Faye, and her mom, Amber. We had a lot of fun! Here are some pix that I took. Faye is so fun to photograph. She's a porcelain doll. Her skin is milky white and her eyes are a pristine clear blue. Simply gorgeous!

Here she is blowing a kiss. Can you even stand it, it's so cute?

Love the toes...

I love how it looks like she's deep in thought.

Look at those eyes...

Meet Nik

I'm very proud to introduce you to my new love: Nikon D60, affectionately known as "Nik." What can I say, I've fallen head over heels for the guy.

This was the first picture we took outside.

For our first date we went to the Guthrie in Minneapolis with Penelope and her two grandma's. It is an edifice of architectural delights.

Here I am tucked in the left corner with Nik.

I love the blue pattern in this photo with my mom and Penelope.

In this one we are outside, looking at our reflection in the blue glass.

Inside.

After being bathed in blue, we went to a small golden box that literally protrudes from the building on the 8th floor (You can actually see the ground from the part-glass floor). This was my favorite part of the Guthrie, a sunny oasis in the frozen tundra for the artistic soul. (So was the apparent reasoning of its architect.)

I still have so much to learn about Nik, but I like him a lot so far.

(Miss you, Mom.)

New Years Resolutions--2009

Having New Years resolutions is inevitably crucial. It gives one purpose and focus for the year ahead to be filled with greatness. Let's face it, I, for one, would like to be great. So, after much reflection, these are my New Years resolutions. Brace yourself. You will be inspired.

1. Always be patient with others and with frustrating situations when it seems natural.

2. Under no circumstances let my daughter watch more than 8 hours of TV at a time. Non-negotiable.

3. Be kind and generous even when there is no other way.

4. Be a better friend to those who always let me have my way. Period.

5. Lose 1 pound. (I learned my lesson from last year. 3 pounds was much too ambitious. This time I'm going with the three year plan. 1 pound per year, with one chance midway to reevaluate and adjust goal as seen fit.)

6. Never be crabby if everything is going perfectly.

7. Be consistently vegetarian whenever there is no meat in the house.

8. Always let others have their way if it matches my way.

9. Always be a good wife and mother when I want to be.


I am resolute. I am determined. I shall not falter. This must be done. It shall be done.

Wish me well.